Another Damn Food Blog

Portions: 8

Calories per Portion: 598

I don't really care about any other nutritional data. Honestly, ever. Sorry.

Edibles:

12 oz (340g)	Holmes Smokehouse Pecan Smoked Andouille Sausage
10 oz (283g)	duck fat (for pan frying)
2 oz (57g)	butter, salted, room temp
8 oz ( 227g)	red, green, & yellow bell pepper, chopped
8 oz (227g)	yellow onion, chopped
1/2 oz (14g)	garlic, chopped
40 oz (1133g)	potatoes, yukon gold or similar
3 sprigs	fresh thyme, stripped
to taste	kosher salt
to taste	cayenne pepper
2 each	green onions, sliced thinly for garnish

Hardware:

• pot for boiling potatoes
• a loaf pan
• large skillet for frying
• parchment paper

Summary:

There’s an internet meme floating around stating, “Anything is a buttplug if you’re brave enough.” There are many variations of course, depicting various household items and spellings of “you’re” but, no pun intended, as I’m looking at the calories per serving on this recipe, I’m thinking to myself, “Huh. I could potentially have two servings of this on my diet if I eat nothing else that day.” That’s when it occurred to me that anything could potentially be diet food, depending on your commitment.

My issue is, I need to be full at the end of the day. To go to bed uncomfortable because, odds are, I won't eat anything the following day until dinner time. So while I could, potentially have those two portions right for dinner and nothing else, it would leave me hungry and well, pissed off about being hungry the following day. So while I do love this dish, it's going to have to be a hard no after the diet starts, cheat days notwithstanding.

I'm also not going to pretend this dish isn't a pain in the ass, but it's totally worth it. It's a potato thing, which means for me, it's a texture thing. I like the crispy outside and the tender/creamy inside with nuggets of andouille and little bursts of peppers to reset the palate a bit.

Total prep time is about 26 hours, so this is one of those things you want to make if company is coming the next day. Just slice it up, fry it up and serve it as breakfast with a poached egg and hollandaise as with eggs Benedict. It would also make a great side for any blackened watermeat. You could also just enjoy it as is. It's your kitchen.

Steps:

1. Mise en place. Always mise en place.

• Dice the peppers & onions. Keep those together.
• Dice the sausage. You don't have to use Holmes Smokehouse, just make sure it's a decent Andouille. I go with Holmes as it isn't overly spicy for my spice averse wife. One day, I'm going to try "Zummo's" andouille because "Zummo" tickles me.
• Rough chop the garlic. You could mince it if you want, but I like getting the odd chunk every now and then.
• Slice your green onions, scallions, whatever, thinly.
• Strip your thyme leaves (Grab the tip, pull backward toward the woody end. Also, the fthe tip breaks off during the pulling, you don't need to strip that part - it's tender enough.)
• Weigh out your fat. Two ounces to mix with the potatoes, 6 ounces for pan frying.
• Line your loaf pan with parchment to extricate your loaf more easily after it cools.
• Fill your pot with cool tap water (I filter mine.) about halfway up. Add enough kosher salt to the water to where it just starts to taste salty. Your potatoes will thank you.
• Wash and peel (or not - I like it "rustic") your potatoes. Cut them into pieces of similar mass. Keep them a bit on the large size so we can abuse them after being par-cooked. I tend to put the potato chunks into the pot with the salt water immediately to keep them from rusting and to cut down on dishes. Mine is a small kitchen.

Alright. The hard part is over. I usually go hit the head and grab a beverage. Let's cook.

2. I place the pot with the potatoes over high heat and cover. When they start to boil, I'll reduce the heat to a simmer, mostly to keep them from boiling over more than anything else. While waiting for the boil, I do the following steps 3 through 5.
3. I crank up a saute pan to medium high heat. When the pan is hot enough, I toss in my sausage cubes and saute them until they are more or less caramelized on the majority of the sides.
4. To my sausage, I add my peppers and onions, tossing to incorporate.
5. When they are just starting to color up, I add my garlic and thyme and toss to incorporate. I really don't want either of those to scorch. When the garlic starts to soften, I remove from the heat and turn to my potatoes which should be just about ready.

Note: when I say saute, I mean keep the sausage and veg moving. We don't want scorching. If you're worried, cover and reduce to medium heat.

6. When the potatoes are done to the point that the tip of a knife does not slip in easily as when they are actually done, but easier than if they are raw, drain the potatoes and put the lid back on them. Leave them off heat and do not taunt them!

Note: This part is tricky, to be honest. Those potatoes are still cooking. For other dishes, I would shock the potatoes in ice water to stop that nonsense, but I don't want to wash off any of the starch. So if you're worried, err on the side of undercooked. You'll have to use your mouth to check.

Here's the thing. as stated, those potatoes are still cooking, that is to say, the starch in the potatoes is still gelatinizing and turning into a sticky mess. They've been drained and there's only so much moisture left with which to gelatinize. That make the starch more "desperate" and more sticky. Good. We want that. It's vital for the dish.

7. When the potatoes have cooled a bit, that is, steam no longer rushes out of the pot when you lift the lid, we gotta free some starch. I do this by abusing the potatoes mercilessly, which is why they are only par-cooked. Make sure the lid is on the pot, hold it down tightly with both hands, and shake the bejeezus out of it. You don't want to break up the potato chunks more than is necessary, but when it's done they need to look like someone has dropped large chunks of potato into some sickly looking mashed potatoes.

Another damn note: If you undercooked the potatoes, you will see no breakage in the potatoes and there won't be a lot of loose potato starch in the pan. Don't panic. Just break up the large chunks a bit and abuse without mercy once more.

8. Make certain your sausage mixture and potatoes have cooled to room temperature and add the sausage to the potato pot. Mix thoroughly without damaging the potatoes any more than you have to.
9. Toss in the two ounces of butter and mix it in until you no longer know it's there.
10. Pan up the mixture into a loaf pan, lined with parchment. Pack them in there tightly.
11. Preheat your oven to 350 degrees, Fahrenheit.
12. Bake your potato brick for about 45 minutes.
13. Let it cool for a couple hours on the counter. Then stick it in the fridge overnight.
14. When your delightful potato loaf has cooled, turn it out onto a cutting board and remove the parchment paper.
15. Slice into eight pieces of the same thickness.

Another another damn note: Use a serrated blade, with minimal pressure and many small back and forth motions. An electric knife is also good for this. Basically, you're going to run into chucks of stuff that will resist a lot of pressure, even with a light saber, and be pushed down through the brick, destroying it. It's usually the sausage. That being said, if the slicing goes badly or all the other notes regarding the treatment/mistreatment of your potatoes did not ensure your success, and catastrophic loaf failure occurred, fret not, good Netizen, There are alternatives.

16. Set a frying pan over high heat. This is imperative, even with a non-stick pan, though I prefer cast iron for this. When the pan is hot enough that a droplet of water skitters across the surface and vanishes, add your duck fat. It will smoke a little - you can bump down the heat to medium high.
17. Gently place your slices into the pan without over crowding it or splashing the duck fat and leave them unmolested for for at least two minutes to set the crust. You can go longer for a crispier crust, but it will get darker and less attractive.
18. Gently flip your potatoes, use a fish spatula and get it all the way under there before lifting in order to support your conglomeration.
19. Let it cook for another two minutes and remove to a wire rack for cooling.
20. Plate and garnish however you want. I won't judge.

A last note: I did not abuse my potatoes enough for decent pictures of the final product. I had no alternative but to pack a ring mold as tightly as possible and let it go 3 minutes on the first side to get it really well set before turning. Full disclosure and all.

Another, and arguably better alternative since this dish has rustic, Cajun roots, is to fire up the oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit, prep a large iron skillet as you would for frying, add your duck fat, turn off the heat, pack in your potatoes carefully, and stick it in the oven for 20 minutes so. let it rest and then flip the whole thing out onto a serving platter and serve wedges, frittata style.

Your food, your kitchen, your call.